Chris Rock Lists God’s Mistakes | Netflix Is A Joke

Chris Rock Lists God’s Mistakes | Netflix Is A Joke


– Na, man, but I love religion. I love watching religion, studying religion. The cool thing about religion is, like, no matter who you pray to, no matter what you study. Every religion follows one basic premise. One basic idea. That every religion follows. And that premise is God
doesn’t make mistakes. Every religion believes that, everybody. God, does not make, (audience laughing) mistakes. I said, God, does not make. (audience laughing) Mistakes. Okay, God don’t make no mistakes? That’s, okay, that’s pretty ambitious thing to say. No mistakes? You ever read the Bible? What does the Bible say
happened on the seventh day? God rested. Okay, seems odd that a
perfect being would rest. (audience laughing) Let me ask you a question. Have you ever been performing a task, it was going perfect and you took a rest? (audience laughing) Has that ever happened in your life? No! That has never fucking happened to you. But what’s happened to you was, you were performing a task, you fucked up (audience laughing) and you though let me rest
before I fuck this up some more. (audience applauding) God doesn’t make mistakes. Hush your mouth. God make plenty of mistakes. You ever see a porcupine? (audience laughing) Can’t eat it, can’t hug it. It’s ugly, it’s sticky, it’s shitting all over the place. Mistake. (audience laughing) What about quicksand? Sand you can drown in. You can drown dry. (audience laughing) You think God meant to make quicksand? Mistake. (audience laughing) You ever been to Mississippi? (audience laughing) (audience applauding) Mistake. M-I-S-S-T-A-K-E. (audience applauding) Are you kidding me? Just a big hunk of racist dirt. Fucking Mississippi. I was there a couple of months ago. I couldn’t even tell what year it was. (audience laughing) That’s how fucked up and
ghetto that shit was. Like, God damn! You know what Mississippi’s like? You know, like, when
you go to the Caribbean, you know, like, when you go to Caribbean, you land and you get in that van. That drive, that scary-ass drive from the airport to the the resort. And you’re looking out the window, you’re like what the fuck? (audience applauding) What the fuck is that shit? Oh my God. Whoa! You see little kids eating dreadlocks. (audience laughing) You see Shabba Ranks stabbing a dog. Shabba, Shabba, Shabba, Shabba. (audience laughing) People looking like they’ve
never saw a car before. (audience laughing) Wheel, wheel. And then you get to the resort and you’re like Jamaica’s nice. (audience laughing)
(audience applauding) It’s so nice, we should invite your mother. (audience laughing) (laughing) They give you one pina colada and you forgive the worst
poverty you’ve ever seen. (audience laughing) (laughing) You take one sip and you’re like, that baby wasn’t really dead, right? (audience laughing) I can’t wait to jet ski. (bouncy music)

100 thoughts on “Chris Rock Lists God’s Mistakes | Netflix Is A Joke”

  1. The people of Mississippi are some of the nicest people around. Only about 10% of the people are hardcore racist. The people who control the power and politics. Quick fact, the people of Mississippi give me in charity relative to their income than any other state.

  2. Using the bible as a reference point is where u messed up.Written by men.

    As for a mississippi…yes its in the south.It also has the highest concentration
    of black people ANYWHERE in the US..If they voted,they could run everything
    in that state.THats IF they voted LOL

  3. Hinduism, Norse, Greek! All there Gods make mistakes. Don’t speak on theology if you only researched the Abrahamic Religions

  4. This is just blasphemy in the highest degree you never try and make a fool out the almighty God Chris rock i hope you repent and ask God to forgive you

  5. It isnnot funny anymore making a joke about christian belief…how about muslim belief?

    Then thats gonna be bang..if you dare

  6. What part a jamaica he drovs through livec here all my life and trust we dont act like that at all very dissapointed in how hs painted jamaica

  7. Why is it that black fuckers like chris rock can not make anyone laugh unless they're being racist or complaining about racism.
    Useless.

  8. That rest was not for him it was to put in place that we were suppose to rest. His well be done in earth as it is in heaven.

  9. The true Mistake: The Platypus, webbed feet like a frog, a bill like a duck, venom like a snake, lays eggs like a bird, and no nipples-sweats milk.

  10. WTF is the little skippy-dance when he first says god does not make mistakes? And at time 4:21 why the hell are his pants hanging down? He seems to have no butt, which surprises me.

  11. You will stand before Jesus for mocking him. I advise you to study the Bible and history. Your money and fame will not save you Chris. It’s disgusting to hear people applause you when you’re mocking God.

  12. Ion know why folks come here ain’t shit to do but do but drugs and to get pregnant like we don’t have shit. Not even a theme park

  13. Despite popular belief, black and white Mississippians are far less obsessed with race than this clown. Yeah, there are racist people here, but that's true everywhere. Motherfuckers act like we wear nothing but overalls and lynch black people daily. Chris Rock is a (real) racist cheese dick.

  14. "Little kids eating dreadlocks" or Little dreadlocks kids eating? "Shabba ranks stabbing a dog?" WTF. The audience thinks it's funny but he is way off point, and shabba ranks not even living in Jamaica.

  15. Whoa … when did Chris Rock get old ? He's starting to look like Apophis from StarGate: SG1 when he was getting old and on a bed in StarGate Command Center.

  16. I've been to Mississippi and lived in both NYC and the bay area there are more opportunities in SF/NY but the ppl of Mississippi both black and white were much nicer.
    The pace of life was slower in ole miss and despite its horrendous poverty the ppl much more at ease.
    In America the bottom line is if you don't have much $ everywhere sucks!

  17. Well, I like Chris Rock. But being born & raised in the Hattiesburg Ms. I wanna say this joke is funny, but not true! Mississippi has one of the largest military & Air Force bases utilized for training. Gave the most money to Sept. 911 rebuilding fund. All your entertainers and athletics are from that same place they just don't claim it once they make it. And ppl are the nicest you ever meet. But the thing about racist in MS they are upfront & let you know they don't like you. Verse these northerners who throw rocks and hide their hands. It's always celebrities who talk shit about Mississippi who have never been or done a thing for the state. Just saying visit first and then give your opinion! But now the Jamaica joke. So true landed in Kingston and that drive to the resort swear I thought we were going to die. Rih #lefteye

  18. Chris Rock — mistake!
    So let me get this straight, black people living in abject poverty in black-run black-controled black-supermajority Jamaica, and to you it's Mississippi — where blacks have 1000000 times better than in Jamaica — that is the racist antiblack hell hole? Ya, that makes no sense. This is just the same old stale and tired blame whitey humor non-humor. Blechh. Zzzzz. You're washed up, Chris Rock.

  19. Hellienism anyone? Or Norse Heathenry. Their gods made a lot of mistakes. Pretty sure they knew it too. The Greeks probably wouldn't voice it for fear of being struck down though.

  20. Two things: 1. Humans are not God – Numbers 23:19. 2. When God rested, it was not due to weariness: rather, establishing the pattern for man's work cycle. He modeled the need for rest. In creating the Sabbath for Israel, it was His sacred ordained day in the weekly cycle. Yeshua (Jesus) said the Sabbath was made for man – Mark 2:2.

  21. He sounds really ignorant Confusing Christianity with all religion. To blame god for humanity’s mistakes, wasn’t even funnny

  22. Older and still that comedic spirit. I used to wait for his HBO specials like kids waited for the new Harry Potter book or the new iPhone!

  23. I wouldn’t pass Mississippi with two states, gotta be at least three states away. Seriously you guys should get your shit together

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