MANGLED MIMES — LÜT #51

MANGLED MIMES — LÜT #51


Lift off first thing in the morning next to
your rocket launcher alarm clock. And watch as it flies majestically alongside
this remote control eagle. Because it’s episode #51 of LÜT. Hook up your optical device with your smartphone
using the HookUpz Universal Adapter. That allows you to record and share everything
you see with your monoculars, binoculars, telescopes, microscopes, night vision or spotting
scopes. Spot liars after hooking them up to the Digital
USB Polygraph. A lie detector test that uses digital sensors to measure skin response and
pulse – the same data in real lie detector sets. Set your Salvador Dali watch to half past
mustache. And if you mustache how dinosaurs loved their
dogs – there’s a book for that. And if you want to fix busted cables there’s
a plastic welder for that. Bondic is the world’s first liquid plastic welder. It’s not a
glue – it won’t dry out and can be used on plastic, fabric, metal and even wood. Would you like a lawn sculpture? Like Dragon
and Chimp and Bat on a branch. Mermaid, Octopus, nothing rhymes with branch. Nothing. Nothing rhymes with branch. Nothing. Branch out from just eating ice cream and
make your own in the ice cream ball. Simply add ice and rock salt in one end and ice cream
mix in the other and roll it around for twenty minutes. Caution DO NOT KICK OR THROW. This carabiner grappling hook to help guide
falling trees or help you climb stuff. Then put your stuff down on a foosball coffee
table which allows you to finally play foosball in front of your couch. Swap out your old couch for some ridiculously
fancy seats from elite home theater seating. They allow you to fully customize everything
from the arm rest, and back rest to whether you prefer the material to be made out of
red silk leather or grape cinesuede. Which sounds grape but if you really love
yourself you’ll give yourself hickies. A no-tie shoelace replacement lacing system
which features a responsive design that moves with your feet. So you can stop bothering
with tying your shoes and spend some quality time with your bag of mangled mimes. I hope you don’t mime morbidity because
here’s some skeleton playing cards that showcase fifty four skeletons found at the
Museum of Osteology. Including everything from the Harpy Eagle to the Pacman Frog whose
clearly hopped his last hop. Foam your hops using the sonic hour portable
beer foam head generator. Simply turn on the device, touch it to a glass of beer and watch
ultrasonic waves create a foam head. Whack your boss in the head after completely
customizing your own whac-a-mole game. Video Amusement offers total graphic customization
from the backlit panels and cabinet side art to the mole heads themselves – just in case
you’ve ever wanted to whac-a-manhole. Fill the hovercraft-sized hole in your heart
by dropping $190,000 on the flying hovercraft. Then don’t be perplexed about what to do
next. The Perplexus Warp is a spherical octahedron maze that’s sure to keep you busy conquering
its eighty challenging events. So stay optimistic because technically, the
glass is always full. And as always – thanks for watching!

100 thoughts on “MANGLED MIMES — LÜT #51”

  1. Sorry to break your philosophy, but if a glass is empty and you fill it half way, it's half full. and if the glass was completely full and you empty half of it, it's half empty 😛

  2. Even more technically, the atoms and molecules of the air and the water un the glass are almost empty spaces

  3. A lot of ppl don't know this, But the Polygraph test. Is just a defective machine thats heavily pushed by Media to be true. Even the Polygraph creator said it was a lie. (no one listened)

  4. words that rhyme with branch: blanch, blanche,branche, cranch,flanch, ganch, lanch,lancz, panch, planch,ranch, scranch,stanch, tranche,carte blanche, dude ranch,avalanche, and, cattle ranch

  5. this is not the most recent episode obviously, but can you do a budget lüt? because I'm looking for gifts and $20+ is too much

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *